All names are made up (except for the band members) in order to protect peoples identities. Spelling and grammar are of little importance. If you are anal, it is highly recommended that you not read further. This diary is protected by the FBI.

Well I was the �Drunken Sex Goddess�, again last night. Not really, I was more like the, �everyone is my friend� drunk. I hung out with Paul and Benny while they did their �magic� for the band Reaction. I started early with a Bloody Mary and followed it up with a gin and tonic. While drinking the BM I had a chat with complete strangers that, just so happened, was sitting near by. Come to find out one of the guys was a DJ for the radio station Star 98. We talked about how their music sucked and he agreed with me. Then this other �everyone is my friend� drunk joined in the conversation. He was an underground punker, dude and we started talking about that. It was an interesting conversation. We were debating what was better, Larz Fredrickson being in Rancid or his solo project Larz Fredcrickson and the Bastards. I think I won that one. I�m not sure.

When the band started, Benny thought it would be a good idea for me to do the lights. Bad mistake! I didn�t know what I was doing. I was drunk for Gods sake. Oh, well. It was fun. I think�..

After the first set, I decided I would sober up a bit and dance during the second set. Besides second sets are always better. When it comes to dancing, I couldn�t give a shit if I were the only one out there. There is just something about music. When it�s playing, I never feel alone. It becomes an extension of myself. Like an extra arm, or something. It�s almost sexual. That�s why I like to move to it. It sounds corny but it�s the honest to god truth. So I�m out there putting on my grove, and sobering up at the same time. Then �Lana�, Marvin's (yes, BJ, Marv's Town Auto rocks) girlfriend decided to join in. It was fun. The whole bar was a mass of really drunk people swaying and moving to the music, and this time I was part of the experience. I never understood why people liked to go listen to bands play. I thought it was pretty boring if I couldn�t be on stage. Now I get it. It�s like the realization that you get when you�re five years old. You know the one. When you realize that you aren�t the only person in the world. Not everything revolves around you. It was like that. Sort of. I realized that the audience, the press of bodies and the smiles and the dirty thoughts racing through their minds, is the real experience. It�s what being in a band is all about. It�s about the affirmation that there are millions of people in the world. They all have their own individual lives; their own happenings, their own emotions, and they bring it to the bar to experience it on a higher level. The band is a tool for release. The band and the alcohol, that is. I can�t forget the alcohol. That would be sacrilege.

So Ya, I had a rocking good time. I did the lights for the last set (by the way, they didn't suck that time) and I helped break down the set when it was all over. Fun for everyone.